Icons Gone

It has been a rough week for icons.

I remember sitting up way too late when I was in grade school, watching Johnny Carson. Hearing "Here's Johnny," signaled the beginning of my evening when I could enjoy some alone time and late night TV. Even then I wasn't a good sleeper. My mom eventually gave up trying to make me sleep and let me go - as long as I got up the next morning. Johnny Carson was a staple of my childhood. And there by his side, always, was Ed. It was the ultimate friendship played out before our eyes every night. Ed went on to other gigs, but he will always remain the best friend.

When Farrah Fawcett came on the scene as one of Charlie's Angels, she was a phenomenon. Anyone my age - male or female - remembers the famous poster and the famous hair. Many of us had "feathered" hair and there was one reason - Farrah. Of course, while most of us could get some semblance of the hair, the flawless face and body didn't come with it. Pity. After leaving the show, she shut up the critics by demonstrating she was more than a body and showed off her acting talent.

Michael Jackson was an innovator in the music business. Thriller remains one of the most successful videos ever made. People said it was ridiculous, that it wouldn't get played because it was too long. I tuned in to watch the world premiere of it and so did millions of others. And every time I catch it, I stop and watch it because it's good. And dozens of other songs and videos are good too. Michael has had more than his share of troubles - I don't know what did or didn't happen - but he always seemed like a man who wanted to have a childhood a few decades too late. It's a shame he didn't get to have one as a child.

Anyone who's a child of the 70s and says they don't remember these three is lying.  We've all heard "Here's Johnny," we've all seen the poster, we can all hum a Michael Jackson tune. They all influenced our times - good or bad.

Loss of a public figure reminds us all of our own mortality. Sometimes we just don't care to be reminded of that, thank you very much. But, nonetheless, there it is. People are moaning why we're not spending time on twitter and facebook and elsewhere talking about North Korea and Iran and the wars. It's because those are nebulous threats to our existence. Getting cancer or dying unexpectedly with no warning are much more real. People feel a need to process. Good grief, let them process.

And, please, just for a change of pace, have a little respect. Regardless of what you thought of any of these people, let those who loved them from near and far have some time to grieve.

Ed - thanks for the laughs, Farrah - thanks for the style, Michael - thanks for the music.
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Settling in

The air conditioning in my office was working well, today. Thank goodness. The Cosmosphere was hit during storms recently and the AC has been up and down in various parts of the building since then. Last week the offices were cool in our section, but it was warm elsewhere. Saturday everything seemed to be functioning.

We had an event Saturday and when I left about noon I turned my office AC so it wouldn't come on too much since I was going to be working for the MHA on Monday. Unfortunately, Monday afternoon about 4 the AC went down. So, when I arrived Tuesday morning it was toasty in my office. Very toasty. We had an appointment in Wichita so we left about 9 and when we got back about 2:30 it was better in there. I certainly wasn't cold, but I was pretty comfy. Early in the day Greg brought me a fan, which was a big help.

I'm settling into things at the Cosmosphere. The problem with starting any new job is that you're already behind when you start because there has been a gap between people where things have piled up. Also, you're just learning how to do everything. Even the simplest of things have to be explained because every place has its own culture and when you're the new person you're trying to figure all that out.

At the Cosmosphere there are tons of different things going on, and each one has its own materials, timeframe, etc., so I'm definitely in learning mode. Fortunately, Marisa and Michele have been very patient with me as I ask a million and one questions every day.

At home I've been working on all my side jobs and the garden. I put some pumpkin vines in this year and I'm starting to fear them. They grow - visibly - every day. So, I go out every day and move the vines to try and get them to grow in a certain direction. On Saturday, I moved them that morning and by that evening they had grown back across the walkway.

This weekend I'm attending a writer's workshop, but after that I hope to get a bit of a handle on my life at home. It is a bit out of control. I worked on things all weekend but didn't get done by a long shot. Why does it seem something is always out of control? I do not know how some people seem to always have everything under control.

I get a tremendous amount of things done in the average day, but there's always something that's undone. I guess maybe I need to do fewer things. But, I like to clean all my cabinets out once a year and wash all the dishes, and I like to have a garden, and I like to write a cookbook column every month, and I like to play in the art studio, and I like to do qi gong (today was the first day I could in awhile!), and I like to teach people social networking, and I like to fill-in-the-blank. There just don't seem to be quite enough hours in every day/night cycle to get it all done.
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Twists and Turns

Life is full of twists and turns. Some of them we can see coming and some are complete surprises. Regardless of how they arrive, we have no way to see around the bend. We just have to forge on ahead and hope for the best.

Every few years I seem to go through a period of tremendous change. Some say we go through a "recycling" every seven years. I'm not exactly on that schedule, but I'm not far off of it either.

From April of 2001 to March of 2002 I had tremendous change - my mother died, and less than a month earlier one of my best friends had been found dead in her house. I left a job I'd had a very long time and started a whole new career. I bought my first house, and moved, leaving an apartment I'd lived in a long time. It was a lot for 11 months.

This year seems to be on track for a lot of change, too. I hope the year brings only positive changes. I'm open to fun, happiness, contentment, joy and delight. Very open.
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Creative Sisterhood and Really Listening

Tonight was Creative Sisterhood. Virginia wasn't able to be here but the rest of us gathered. It was a different kind of night, but good.

I am continually being reminded these days that listening is important. How often in life do you feel like you're really being heard? I'm guessing it's less often than you would like. Creative Sisterhood is always an opportunity to be heard, and to listen.

Sometimes our most important role is to listen - really listen. Way back when, when I was learning to be a journalist, one of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from University of Kentucky professor, Maria Braden. The advice was to always be listening to the answer someone gave you during an interview, instead of forming your next question. It's a difficult thing to do when you feel you'll be judged on the quality of your questions.

In various jobs I had - in TV, radio and print - multiple people complimented my interviewing skills. I wanted to take credit, as if I had invented some new way of asking questions. But I knew it was just because Maria Braden lived in my head, gently shaking her finger at me when I had the urge to jump in with another question too soon.

When you really listen, occasionally you hear a barely perceptible hesitation when a person is deciding if they should give voice to a story that hasn't been told until that moment. It's an honor to bear witness to that. And it only happens when you listen. Really, really listen. And pause.

There have been times I was holding my breath in those pauses, waiting for what was next, hoping I was capable of doing justice to the story being formed. When people tell their real stories, they share their souls, something that must be treated with respect.

One of the things I've learned, that I would share with students if I were in the position Maria Braden was, is that people have sometimes been wanting to tell their stories for a very long time. They've just been waiting for someone who would listen. Really listen.
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Ten Ways to Be Happier Today

Ten Ways to Be Happier

1. Find joy in the simplest of things.
Bumping into an old friend, having a fabulous conversation, getting a great parking place on a busy afternoon, or finding a new treasure at Goodwill can all give me a happiness boost.
2. Appreciate good things consciously.
When good things happen take time to consciously appreciate them - not to just accept them and brush them off.
3. Count your blessings.
Get a notebook and write down three things about today you're grateful for. If you can't think of anything consider you have a pen and paper and you're able to write. That alone means you have some material comforts and your brain and body are functioning. Do not take these things for granted. (See #2.)
4. Quiet time.
You will never find the answers to life's questions if you can't even hear the questions. We all need quiet time to think, to meditate, to contemplate. Insist on it.
5. Decide to be happy.
I am blessed to be happy most of the time. Does that mean everything is going perfectly in my life? No. Absolutely not. It means I choose to react to things in the most positive way I can find. It means I make a conscious decision every single day - sometimes every single hour of the day - to look for happiness.
6. Forgive.
If you're going through your life holding a grudge, harboring ill will, or with a chip on your shoulder you're never going to be happy. Let it go. Things are the way they are. Not even God changes the past.
7. Say no.
"No" is a complete sentence. It does not require justification or explanation. If you learn to say no, you protect yourself from committing to things you don't want to do.
8 Do what makes you happy.
Sounds simple enough, but how often do you do what you really want to do? Exactly. Make time to do it more. The floor can wait to be mopped. Really.
9 Invite friends over.
People who have friends are happier. Engaging with friends face to face releases all kinds of stress-relieving chemicals we don't get any other way.
10. Don't wait for someone else to make you happy.
It's a losing proposition to wait for someone else to make you happy. Get about creating your own happiness. Today. Now.
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Grounding, Gratitude and Going Forward

I'm feeling contemplative these days. The year is not even half over and I've run a gamut of emotions since we flipped the calendar. I need some grounding, and it is out of my reach at the moment.

One of my Top Ten Rules for Living is that when you've lost your way in the world, you have to return to something that grounds you. When there you can reset your compass and go forth into the world again.

I have some things that always ground me. I'm grounded by going to Kentucky and seeing "my people," and going to the confluence of the Ohio and Mississippi Rivers near Cairo, Illinois. Unfortunately, I just can't make that long of a trip yet. I haven't been on a trip longer than to Joplin - less than five hours - at a time since surgery. Certain things are still painful and sitting upright in a car for extended periods is one of them. So, that's not an option yet.

There are other things that really ground me, too. But, for various reasons, spending extended periods of time with any of those is not an option right now, either.

So, where does that leave me? A bit dazed, out of sorts, unsteady, uncertain and uneasy. And what to do about that? Deal with it. Nothing else I can do. I'm spending more time in meditation these days, seeking internal grounding. I've also been writing more with pen and paper, which is different than the writing I do here.

This is not a "poor me," whiney post. I wake up every day grateful to be alive. Literally. I have for many years, but it has taken on a new meaning in the last few months. I like to start the day with a quick prayer of thanksgiving that I'm alive and thinking and talking and hearing and walking and seeing and functioning. Frankly, for a very long time, what I feel when I wake up is surprise that I've made it through another day and night, and that's followed by gratitude.

In time I'll find the grounding I need. I think I'm just going to have to search for it harder. I've been blessed that it has been readily available to me for many years and it's not right now - ironically, it's a time when I need it desperately. So much has happened the last few months that I need that stability, but maybe I'm meant to find a new way.

I am a different person than I was six months ago. I don't think it's possible for someone to take the journey I did and be the same on the other end. It also changes everyone around you, because they're taking a journey, too. Like you, they had no choice in the matter. But, they do have a choice of whether or not to open themselves to that sort of thing again.

I'm starting to think that the people who come out on the other side may have to find new common ground. It's also possible that the person I've become just isn't appealing to the same people anymore. Maybe once people have seen you weak, needy, sick or frightened you can't ever go back.

Or maybe it's just that everyone needs to settle into their new beings and learn how to function in the world as that person. I know I do. I don't know this person, yet. And I need to ground myself well before I start to explore that.

I hope I like this person.

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Cosmosphere has Russian Space Suits and the Trophy Trout

This morning was Coffee at the Cosmosphere, which they do every third Thursday. The CEO, Chris Orwoll, shows and talks about some of the artifacts in the collection that aren't on display at the moment.



Today's topic was Russian Space Suits. He had a variety of suits, from various time periods, and talked about the particular designs of each one.

 



He had a little something extra this morning - three recently donated items that were gifts people involved with the space program exchanged. These were largely gag gifts, but memorable ones.



One was the "Trophy Trout," given to Guenter Wendt by astronaut Mike Collins on July 16, 1969. The trout was "fresh" when nailed on the board and presented to Wendt. He had it in his freezer for 14 years before he found someone who could freeze dry and preserve it.

These will eventually be on display at the Cosmosphere. Today was a sneak preview. Hear the whole story:

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Going, going, going

I've been running from one thing to another all day today. It was 4:30 this afternoon before I got to have lunch. I had hoped to get to bed early but at 1:15 it's probably too late for that considering I'll be getting up about 6:30. Oh well, I'll try for tomorrow.

If I owe you email or phone calls or FB notes or anything else for a volunteer job or board - or if you're a friend who has been very patient already - please be patient with me a little longer as I go through the next few weeks of finishing up things for the MHA and starting at the Cosmosphere. I'm also still doing all my side jobs, so my brain is pretty full.

I promise, if you've asked me about something, you're on the list. It will just be awhile before I can get through the list.

Fortunately, I don't need as much sleep as other people, but I do need some. And I'm gonna go do that now.
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Quote of the Day

"To get a good look at yourself, take yourself far away."
John LaPlante.
________________

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It has been a week and it's only Tuesday

Monday night Greg and I were coming back from Joplin and spotted these clouds near Beaumont. We had some rain between there and Wichita, but nothing serious. We stopped in Wichita to run some errands and get dinner. While we were there, these clouds - or others like them - produced 90 mph winds in Hutchinson where we live. Fortunately, neither of us had any wind damage to our houses that we can determine.

However, we arrived to discover neither of us had power. I had turned my AC up so it wouldn't come on unless it got really hot. Needless to say, my house was uncomfortable.

Thankfully, Sharon invited both of us to spend the night. Everytime I woke up in the night all I could hear was the purring of the air conditioner - a lovely sound. I would call my house everytime I woke up. Finally, later this morning, I heard the fax machine pick up - another welcome sound. It would have been impossible to sleep here last night - very hot and stuffy. I was so grateful to be able to actually sleep last night as I had a busy day ahead - putting a couple of days worth of work into one.



Now, if you were reading carefully - and there's no reason you should be, really. You'd notice I said we were coming back Monday night. Is that because I had everything done for both jobs, as well as my house, and decided to take Monday off? No, that would not be the case.

Sunday night we had the car loaded and I walked out with the last two things. I said to Greg, "unlock the trunk so I can put my purse in." He unlocked it and said, "my key won't come out." We assumed it was just stuck a little. But it was stuck a lot.

We putzed around but couldn't do anything with it. A round of phone calls ensued to various places that might be able to fix it. Eventually Steve or Miss Joy one suggested calling a locksmith. I decided I'd call AAA instead. They wanted to know if the same key started the car as unlocked the trunk. No. They don't consider your vehicle disabled if that's the case and will not provide service. That is just the latest in a long line of AAA disappointments. The fact that there was torrential rain between Joplin and Hutchinson was not an important consideration. I called a locksmith on my own and he said he couldn't fix it anyway.

So, we unpacked the necessities we needed for another night in Joplin and started hunting for someone to replace the trunk lock. I put a note out on some social networking sites and one of my friends said he would call his Uncle who lived in the area and ask the next morning. That's how we found Bill's Service Center, that fixed the trunk for me. Thanks, RJ, for the suggestion. They were great.

And when we were driving through the rain Monday night I was glad we had just stayed and gotten it fixed.

Today I spent the whole day running from one thing to another. It was a frantically busy day and then tonight was the MHA meeting. Tomorrow I've got a long list of things to get done. I had planned to get to bed early. I'm not sure at 1:15 a.m. you can be thinking about that, really.

I want to get up early in the morning to do a couple of things in the garden before work. I planted another tomato plant tonight. My herbs are doing great. Bob and Ruth next door gave me some lettuce from their garden tonight. I was over there briefly to help them with the computer they just got. I'm so tickled they'll be able to use my wireless signal. They're such great neighbors it's nice I can provide a little tiny thing for them.
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Safe

I am back home safely. No major storm damage to my house that I can see but no power. Posting from the phone.

Joplin and Mechanical Woes

We're in Joplin for a few extra hours. Greg and I were loading the car and were putting in - literally - the last two items. He unlocked the trunk with his key so I could put them in, and the key got stuck in the open position. So, the trunk will not close.

We putzed with it for quite a while and finally decided to just give it up and stop messing with it. There was tons of rain between Joplin and Hutch so we couldn't tie it shut enough to keep the water out for a five hour trip back. So, we unpacked the computers and settled back in for a few more hours.

I'm in the market for a Joplin mechanic in the morning. My guess is this is a very simple thing to fix, but we don't have the knowledge or tools to do it.

Unfortunately, I had a really busy Monday on tap, most of which required me to be there in person. So, I'll just do the best I can do with things remotely - already have done some tonight - and have to cram a bunch more into Tuesday than I had wanted. But, so it goes... Not much I can do about the whims of mechanical devices. This is not a problem I've ever seen before so just gotta roll with it.

Jolly Mill near Granby Missouri

This afternoon Greg, his girlfriend Mia, his Mom and I went to Jolly Mill near Granby, Missouri. There's an old mill there, as well as this waterfall, and some cool walkways and bridges.



I was quite taken with the greenery on the side of the old mill.

Of course, you knew I couldn't be in nature for any amount of time without seeing...



I swear, the things look for me. Greg jokes that they're slithering around saying "paaatsssssssy" and I think he's right. We heard a kid say, "Look, there's a snake!" Miss Joy was ahead of me and saw it in the water first. I walked the few feet over to where she was and - I'm not joking - it turned and started swimming toward me. She said later she thought it was going to come out of the water and she was getting ready to retreat. Why oh why do they like me so much? I can't stand them. I just want to coexist peacefully, hopefully unaware of each other's existence. But, alas, that is not to be.

They scare me and I can't help it. And, the fact that one of them bit my ankle a few years ago did nothing to improve our relationship.



This is a neat area with some nice walkway bridges over the water in various places, as well as this old iron bridge that I'm guessing was used for cars at one time.



There were lots of families out with lots of fishing going on. I don't get the fishing thing, but I think it's just great for others to do it. Obviously, I could never do it even if I wanted to, because the snakes would be circling around me all the time.



Miss Joy and Mia saw another snake by the mill. I had been over there and wandered away. No doubt it was just trying to figure out where I had gone and find a way to get to me.



And... my own self portrait...



Yeah, I thought it was funny too...

Much, much funnier than snakes swimming toward me.

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Quote of the day

Work while you have the light. You are responsible for the talent that has been entrusted to you.  
                                          Henri-Frederic Amiel

I find this quote to be a lovely turn of phrase, and thought provoking at the same time. "Work while you have the light." Isn't that a beautiful, literal and figurative, phrase?

The second part of this is more of an admonishment, or perhaps a reminder, that we must use the talents we are given. It gives credence to the idea that we must make the most of them, too.

I would go one step further and say that it instructs us to be doing what we, individually, were meant to be doing. Otherwise, we are not acting responsibly toward our talents. So, to be in a profession that doesn't make your heart sing is not treating your talent as it deserves to be treated.

So much to think about.

Canopy Beds and Other Mysteries of Life

I've always had a love of things substantial. I like my beds with canopies, my fireplaces marble, and my garden urns iron. I, however, have none of these things.

I was in a home today that had all of these things, and it caused me to wonder why I am drawn to them. They're attractive, of course, but so are dozens of other things that I don't give more than a passing glance to. So, why am I drawn to the particular things that hold my fancy?

I never feel as at home anywhere as I do in a Victorian-era home. It feels natural to me. I feel settled. I look around and find something pleasing to the eye everywhere I glance. I have the sense of people about to knock on the door and I'm eager to sit and visit with them over tea. Why is that what feels comfortable to me?

As I was looking at this bed today, which was curtained on all four sides, and could have had a canopy on it, I realized that I've been wanting a canopy bed since before I knew how to say the word. I was very young when I read about a canopy bed and started asking for a "ca-noopy" bed. (Rhymes with Snoopy, in case you're wondering.)

I've known the proper pronunciation of the word for a few decades, and yet I do not have a canopy bed. In fact, I have never even slept in one. Is that pathetic? Yes, it is. Surely I could have located a B and B somewhere that had one I could stay in. But I haven't. A few times it has been a possibility but I could never convince myself to spend the extra money for the room with the canopy bed. It seems silly, and yet the longing remains.

Why do we deny ourselves like this? This seems such a simple desire to fulfill and yet I've failed to do so. It may be that I wouldn't really like sleeping in one. I have an unnatural fear of something "falling on my head" so a whole bunch of wood and fabric above me might give me reason to pause. But, it still seems like a good idea. I still want one. I still love they way they look. I have very high ceilings in my house - perfect for accomodating a canopy bed.

There are two interesting questions here about the things that attract us and the things we allow ourselves to have. We humans are infinitely interesting creatures. I wish I understood us. Or even me.

But I guess for tonight I will lay my body down in a regular bed and dream of ca-noopies overhead.

What is the World Coming to?

Does it mean you're getting old when you start thinking things like, "What is the world coming to?"

If so, I fear I may be getting old.

It seems impossible, but the last few weeks I've heard that refrain in my head more than once. What IS the world coming to? All you have to do is watch the news for twelve minutes and it's all you can think of.

North Korea has nuclear power, GM stock got down to $1.09, Donald Trump is fretting over a beauty queen's crown, a doctor was killed to protest killing, and being a museum guard is suddenly a deadly job.

What is the world coming to?

Being Heard

We all have a tremendous need to be heard - to feel like people are listening to what we are saying and taking it into account. Why is that so difficult? At times it seems impossible to explain myself in a way that others understand. And I'm sure others would say I seem incapable of understanding what they're saying. Why is being heard, truly heard, so difficult?

I Have a New Job

I have a new job.

I will be the Public Relations and Events Coordinator at the Kansas Cosmosphere and Space Center.

This is a world-class, Smithsonian-affiliated museum and I'm excited about the new job. When you work in any new field you learn new things at an amazing rate and I love that. It's thrilling to drop into a new world and learn to navigate it.

I will be finishing things up for the MHA this month. This job has offered tremendous opportunities to be involved in people's lives in meaningful ways. How can you be anything but humbled when you have the chance to help save lives? And humbled I am. I'm also grateful to the people who've made it possible for the MHA to do that work. I want to say a public thank you to the board, volunteers and other organizations I've had the pleasure of working with the past seven years.

The national office at MHA America is one of the best run organizations I've ever seen. Everyone is dedicated to the work and inspired to do their best. I've been so fortunate to be involved in the mental health movement, but it's time for me to do something new and for the MHA locally to be run by someone who wants to do new and exciting things here.

So, that's my big news. I applied for the Cosmosphere job back in April, but it took awhile to go through the process. I'm excited about the job, the people and the new things I'll be learning. I've always wanted to work in a museum and I've always wanted to work in tourism, so I think this will be an extraordinarily good fit. I think we can do some cool things together.

Needless to say, I'll keep you posted.
________________

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Food Coma Caravan

Some friends and I have been on what we call the "Food Coma Caravan." In the front are Greg and Kris. In the back, Sharon, me, Carl and Mark. It's sort of a "whoever can come" event. Mia, Todd and Tara couldn't come this time. And I'm still hoping to go on one with Wayne.

Carl is the organizer. In fact, on this trip I started referring to him as "The Carl," as in "All Hail The Carl," because he finds such cool stuff. He picks a series of locally owned restaurants in an area, finds us a cool locally owned motel/hotel/cabin and we travel in a dot-to-dot method, seeing the sights, punctuated with interesting meals.

We stayed at the Sky-Vue Lodge, which had cabins for rent. "Cabins" in this case means homes. They all came with a view. This was the view out the back door of our cabin this morning.



We've done places in Missouri, Kansas and now Arkansas. Carl has a real knack for planning. He finds cool spots all over the place. He and Kris had been to some of them before, and some of them were new to them, too. But, he finds some gems.

For example, this morning we had breakfast at the Oark General Store, Oark Arkansas - founded in 1890. After breakfast we went to a swinging bridge. Yesterday we visited Fort Smith, Arkansas. The day before we ate at Joe's Pizza and Pasta in Fort Smith, which you don't want to miss Last night we finished off the day with ice cream at the Dairy Dream in Mountainburg. At least that's what the sign on top of the building said. But, as you can see from the photo above, they also have burgers.

One of the highlights of this trip was something Carl couldn't plan. One night as we were coming back, Greg, Sharon and I saw a bear. A BEAR! In the wild. Just going about his business, doing bear things. He was along the roadway, and crossed over it in front of us, then back again. We saw him for probably thirty seconds at least. It was so incredibly cool. I've never seen a bear in the wild. Amazing!

I just adore seeing Carl and Kris - such a great couple - and I don't get to see them often enough. It's always fun to get a group together and see how the mix works. I so appreciate the work Carl does to make the FCC happen. He is the only person I will let plan travel on my behalf. The only one.

All Hail The Carl.

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Fireflies

I saw the first fireflies of the season tonight. Brought back lots of memories. How long has it been since you slept with a jar of fireflies beside your bed? It has been way too long for me. I intend to rectify that this summer.

Addie Lee Hunnicutt Lister at Devil's Den State Park

This morning I met Addie Lee Hunnicutt Lister, and my life is richer for it.

Addie Lee was another guest at the Sky-Vue Lodge in Winslow, Arkansas. This morning at breakfast there were two tables of guests. Everyone at one table left except her, so, I said, "Come join us." She came over, limping slightly, saying she had broken her pelvis a couple of years ago and was still using a walker when on rougher ground.

Kris and I started talking to her and learned that she spends every June in Winslow, volunteering at Devil's Den State Park, talking about when it was built as a CCC project. That is the Civilian Conservation Corp, which was the equivelant of the WPA for 18-21 year olds.



Addie Lee met her husband when he was working at Devil's Den Park as a young man. Devil's Den is known for the extraordinary rock work, which Addie Lee says was built on the strong backs of young men.



She and her husband had quite a life together, until he died in 2002. He eventually became a pharmacist and they had a son together.

Devil's Den State Park wanted to add a statue to commemorate the CCC, and Addie Lee and her son made the final necessary contribution to make it possible.



Addie Lee was asked to write the plaque that is below that statue.



In the visitor's center - our first stop after arriving in the park - we found Addie Lee is mentioned in the information there.



If you're lucky, and you come in June, you'll get the chance to visit with Addie Lee at the park. Or at Sky-Vue Lodge over a delcious breakfast. But, you might want to visit soon. Addie Lee says she will turn 92 on July 4 and she's just not sure she'll be able to come next year.



However, I gotta tell you, I'm betting on Addie Lee.
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Funerals

I attended the funeral service today of Greg's aunt, who was a nun. Gathered together were her family of blood and her family of choice, as well as many others who's lives she touched over the years she served in schools and hospitals.

She was 89, and her mind had started to slip in the last few years. I didn't know her well enough to say for certain but I'm guessing she was aware that was happening early on and it must have been terrifying. But of course that's the perspective of someone outside her belief system. Maybe with her faith she simply accepted it without question and with grace.

The beautiful St. Peters in Joplin was filled with people who remembered her from the many years she worked there. The breast care center at St. John's hospital where she served was named after her some years ago. There's a garden there dedicated to the memory of her mother.

She was the last of her generation, The last of a family of five brothers and two sisters.

I am so proud of Greg and how he conducted himself the last week and a half. When he got word she was nearing the end he took off to Omaha, where her order has a retirement facility. Greg was by her side for the days and nights, holding her hand and talking to her about anything pleasant, and assuring her of the love of her family, mentioning people by name. Greg was with her when she died.

It is an honor to attend the dying, but it is not easy. Some are more equipped to deal with such things than others. But it's not easy for anyone. Greg simply knew it was a gift to be able to be present for those you love in times of need.

Sister lived her life such that many gathered today to celebrate it. Who among us could expect the same?

Consuming Content and Creating Content

I remember reading a statistic once that an adult in 1900 was exposed to the same amount of information in their lifetime that is contained in one Sunday edition of the New York Times today. Can you imagine that? It seems impossible, and yet it's obvious we are all processing information at a tremendous pace.

Below is just a sampling of what has crossed my path today. One was from Twitter, one from Facebook and one from email. I didn't plan it that way, but realize that's the case.

Why NPR is doing better than other Mainstream Media outlets
Literal Video Version of Total Eclipse of the Heart (not work safe)
Executive of SPJ wrote blog post for his wife to put up after his death at 45

In addition to these things, today I learned a friend will have his documentary shown on PBS (congrats, Nathan!), Marci wrote about the grand reopening of the 1905 Weaver Hotel in Waterville, a town of 664, and another friend sent a note to not miss Steve Earle on Letterman tonight.

I love knowing these details about the world around me, but I confess I have a hard time keeping up with everything sometimes. I know I miss details. But, it's fascinating to be able to peek into other people's worlds.

There are podcasts, you tube and blogs to supplement the connections made on facebook, twitter and other sites. Everywhere I turn there is content coming at me - and much of it is very useful, interesting content. When I'm not consuming content I'm creating it. It's a cycle I'm not sure we can maintain forever. Unless we figure out how to put more hours in the day.

Maybe I should go google that. Or should I bing it instead? Are we saying that yet? I guess bing hasn't yet earned the right to be a verb. Let me rephrase... maybe I should go check bing.

By the way, thank you for reading along here and consuming the content on this blog. I'm continually flattered that you share my life and thoughts.
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All text and photos on this website are copyright Patsy Terrell, unless otherwise noted. All rights reserved. None are to be used without permission. Thank you.

Ch-ch-ch-changes...

I've made some changes to the blog layout. Overall they're minor, but hopefully give a cleaner look and address problems some people have had viewing it in Firefox.

Often I cannot see the problems people are having, so please let me know if something looks weird on your end.

It seems it has been a very long time since I first went to Wichita with Anthony and the folks at what was then Southwind gave me a thirty minute lesson on how to design webpages. We came back to Hutch and I was turned loose to make something. Amazingly enough, I got something online in just a few hours. Over the next few days I learned a lot of things about html.

That was back in the "dark ages" - 10 or 12 years ago maybe - before we had programs to do much of the work for us. Then you had to know or look up the code for any little trick you wanted to do. I learned the value of the word "tutorial" in searches. I used it liberally and still do when I'm learning some new thing.

Now I have dreamweaver and the world of options it offers. But, I often find it easier to experiment to get whatever effect I'm after. I always intend to teach myself more, but it's hard to find the time to do that when there are dozens of other things demanding attention.

I am thankful I know some basics. I would hate to be completely at the mercy of someone for every little bit of web design I wanted done. I have a couple of things I'd like to do with the blog that I have to figure out how to do. We'll see when I have time to get to that. I don't expect it to be anytime soon.

But, in the meantime, let me know if you experience any problems viewing it. Thanks.
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All text and photos on this website are copyright Patsy Terrell, unless otherwise noted. All rights reserved. None are to be used without permission. Thank you.

Planning

I've never thought of myself as a planner. If you plan everything out, you're not likely to go beyond the plans. And, generally, I think people don't dream big enough. So, a plan can hold you back.

That said, I am a list maker. I realize this is a sort of plan. It's a roadmap of the day/week/month and what needs to happen. I also like to have some idea of where I'm headed in the next day/week/month/year if there are things happening that require some lead time. And how many things don't require some lead time? So, in that sense I suppose I'm a planner. I just like to leave room for those happy surprises that come along.

I'm also an obsessive calendar person. If you tell me about something that's happening next February, I'm going to get it on the calendar so nothing gets scheduled over it. I have never understood how some folks never seem to have anything on their calendars. You'll be talking about getting together for something and you'll suggest a date and people will just say, "Okay, that's fine," without consulting a calendar. How do people do that? It just amazes me they can remember their schedule like that, and/or that they don't have anything on their calendar.

I've always got things on my calendar - from the downtown art walk to lectures to work-related events. How is it that others don't have to keep a schedule? How does that work? Inquiring minds want to know. It seems quite wonderful to be able to just let the wind take you where it will on any given day.

Today has been one of those days where my list/plan for the day was completely tossed out, destroyed, and overridden by noon. It was a good day - just not the day I had planned for.

It caused me to joke on twitter that planning is obviously a waste of my time. Then as I thought about that in the back of my mind this afternoon I started to consider if that's a joke or a universal truth I've stumbled upon. Maybe those folks who never have to look at their calendar have figured out something that has eluded me. I need to cozy up to one of them and learn their secrets.

Maybe I, too, can be one of those people without a single worry when someone suggests brunch on the 23rd. I can effortlessly say, "sure, that sounds perfect." Now, I just have to get someone to start suggesting brunch. I'll pencil that in on my to-do list.
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Thinking

I had my first salad out of the garden today. It was a small salad, but good, with some arugula, sorrel and salad burnet, combined with some feta cheese and pine nuts. I needed to do something grounding today so worked in the garden a little bit.

This has been a weird day for those of us who live near Wichita. Dr. George Tiller was shot and killed in his church this morning. He has been targeted by abortion opponents for years, and been a victim of attempted murder, but it's a shock nonetheless.

I found out about this shortly after Greg called to tell me his Aunt died this morning She was a nun in retirement in Omaha. I'm so very proud of Greg for heading to Omaha when she started fading. He was with her when she passed and I'm so glad he was there. I know he will be glad he went. It is an honor to attend the dying.

Tonight, there was a shooting in a small town north of here. Details are sketchy but it appears two people are dead in that incident.

All of this makes me think about how important it is to live fully every day. I'm guessing Dr. Tiller wasn't thinking it could be his last day on Earth when he was getting ready for church this morning. None of us ever know. In "The Geography of Bliss," someone gives the author the advice to contemplate his own death 10 minutes every day. I assume the idea is that you will then be aware of its possibility and live more fully.

I haven't been out of my house today other than to my backyard. It has just been a day when I didn't want to mix with other folks very much. I have to try to make sense of things on my own, I guess. So I've worked around the house and read and thought.

I'm working on making new dreams for myself, just as I suggested to a friend. It seems so easy, and yet there are so many layers to it. But it's definitely time for me to be doing that, too. So much to think about.
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Dr. George Tiller Shot and Killed in Wichita

Dr. George Tiller was shot and killed at his church this morning in Wichita. He was pronounced dead at the scene, according to news reports from KAKE. Dr. Tiller, who performed abortions, was a controversial figure in the abortion debate and had been a victim of attempts on his life before.

I will never understand why anyone with an "all life is precious" belief thinks murder is an appropriate way to demonstrate that.

When you whip people into a frenzy over any topic, some of them will go too far with it.  I don't think there has ever been a case of a person with a pro-choice mindset killing someone with a pro-life mindset because of their beliefs. What is happening in the pro-life movement that results in this dramatic reaction?

My sympathies to the family and friends of Dr. Tiller.
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Make New Dreams

"Make new dreams" is the advice I gave to a friend a few years ago, and repeated the other night, in response to a question she asked. It sounds so simple. It's three words. How complex can it be? Right?

Well, maybe...

Dreams are tricky. They often come true. And only then do you realize they're not all they're cracked up to be. Anyone who has fallen out of love can attest to that. It's a shock when we get something we've wanted and discover what we've been dreaming about doesn't hold up in reality.

So... what to do? Make new dreams.

I honestly can't think of any other option. Without a dream you just pass through the days without really experiencing them.

I'm busy making new dreams, myself, lately. They're just taking shape now, but I'll keep you posted as they develop.
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Appreciating Disappearing Scenes

I took a long drive yesterday. I was out and about anyway and I just needed some time to think. There's something magic about the steering wheel. It seems to engage different parts of the brain and I can think things through as the miles pass.

Yesterday I was thinking about things that are disappearing from our world. One of those is cattle grazing in a field. It's becoming rare. They're almost always crammed into a feed lot where a particular diet can quickly fatten them up for slaughter.

I'm not sure when that change happened, exactly. I just became aware that it had - past tense. It makes me wonder what I'll be longing to see again five years from now that is commonplace today. I hope I'm appreciating whatever it is.

I guess that's always the trick - to be appreciating what is right in front of us.
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Rural Tourism Training

I took the day off today to work with Marci and WenDee at a training for rural tourism folks. It was such a  cool experience to be involved in a Kansas Sampler project.

My part of the day was to show folks how to blog, and a quick overview of Facebook and Twitter. It was so incredibly cool to see folks willing to jump in and give things a go. There's so much potential for rural Kansas to use these tools to tell people what there is to see and do.

Marci refers to folks who are willing to "do dirt" to see what's on the backroads as having an "explorer" mindset. Explorer types want to experience the local culture, whatever it is. I can't imagine traveling any other way, myself.

I was so jazzed that after the event, I did a little exploring myself where I caught this little bit of nature.


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